How It Affects You When Your Spouse Has Bad Credit
There’s a belief that you don’t really know someone until you’ve lived with them – and it’s true. You usually don’t find out about all your spouse’s quirks and personality traits until you’re under the same roof for an extended period of time. Therefore, it’s not really surprising that many people have no idea their spouse has bad credit before they’re married.
In fact, most people don’t feel very comfortable discussing finances at all when they’re dating. It’s not until vows have been spoken and long after the honeymoon is over that the topic of credit comes up.
At that point, it leaves many people wondering how their spouse’s bad credit will affect them. Below, you’ll find the answer to that question.
The Ins and Out of Marriage and Credit Scores
The effects of one spouse’s credit on another’s aren’t as cut and dried as it may seem. We’re going to take it step by step to make it as simple as possible, though.
No Automatic Effects
When you get married, everything seems to merge. Your space, your bills, your furniture – suddenly it no longer belongs to just one of you.
Credit is a little different, though. Marrying someone with a bad credit score does not automatically impact your score. Your score remains yours and theirs remains theirs – no merging involved.
Overall Joint Financial Impact
Some couples choose to keep their finances separate after they marry, which is certainly an option. They divide the bills and keep their income apart. This may seem like a smart move if your spouse has bad credit, but the truth is that it can still impact your finances.
Think about it: bad credit can mean your spouse is paying a higher interest rate or struggling to pay their portion of the bills. You might think this isn’t a big deal if your finances are separate, but it can affect your ability as a couple to save for a house, a car, a vacation, or any other goal you might have. In this way, their credit can impact your quality of life.
You should also consider the fact that, sometimes, credit can keep people from getting a job. If your spouse cannot find a decent job, that’s another issue that can impact your future.
Impact on Joint Ventures
Possibly one of the biggest ways your spouse’s credit score can affect you is if the two of you try to get a loan together. If, for instance, you apply for a mortgage loan, the lender is going to take both of your scores into account. Even if your score is perfect, your spouse’s credit score can affect the amount you can borrow and the interest rate that you have to repay.
You also have to think about things like renting a home. Many property managers and landlords check potential tenants’ credit before approving an application. That means that there’s a chance you’ll get turned down for a home or apartment if your spouse’s credit score is too low.
Should I Marry Someone With Bad Credit?
All of this may seem really scary but take a breath. Marrying someone with bad credit is not necessarily a mistake or a bad idea. You just need to understand how it can impact your life so that you’re prepared for it. Credit can be fixed, so it’s not really a reason to avoid getting married.
A more serious concern would be bad financial habits, such as excessive overspending or intentional avoidance of obligations. These things can be addressed, too, but it might require some counseling, commitment, and willingness on their part to change their habits.
What to Do If Your Spouse Has Bad Credit
Again, bad credit can be fixed. If you’ve married someone with bad credit, don’t give up hope. There are some steps you can take to get things on a brighter track.
Have a Serious Talk
One of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship is communication, and this is definitely one of the times to put that into practice. Choose a time when you can focus on each other and when tensions aren’t high due to work or other stress.
Go into the conversation with an open mind and heart. People can end up with bad credit for a number of reasons – not all of them are due to neglecting bills.
When I was younger, an ex stole some cards of mine and ran up a giant credit card bill in my name. I didn’t even realize it was gone for a while because I only had that card for emergencies and hadn’t needed it. That, along with some other things he did out of spite for our breakup, kept me in debt for years.
The point is that bad credit happens, and it’s not always the person’s direct fault. So go in ready to listen and without judgment, even if you realize it was their “fault”. What happened in the past is in the past. The point is what they do about it now.
After you’ve listened, express your concerns. Let them know that you want the two of you to enjoy a financially secure future and ask if they’re willing to get it all worked out.
Make a Plan
Assuming they want to work it out as much as you do, it’s time to make a plan. You can use a tool like the Goalry Mall to help you organize debts, track payments, and set a budget the two of you can follow. You can also find great information to help you make your plan and tips for getting out of debt.
Work the Plan
Okay, here’s where it can get a little dicey in many relationships. Sometimes, the spouse with good credit doesn’t feel they should have to help pay off the debt. That’s completely up to you. Just be sure you communicate this – in a respectful manner – upfront when you’re making the plan. You don’t want your spouse expecting you to help if you’re not going to.
And sometimes, the spouse with bad credit wants to do it on their own. This is fine, too, as long as the two of you agree on it.
Whether the two of you pay off the debt together or not, you should still check in with each other every now and then. See how it’s going, if there’s anything they need help with, and so on. This provides them with a little accountability and keeps you in the know.
If the two of you decide that you won’t be helping to pay off their debts, there are still other things you can do. For instance, you might call the debt collector and work out a payment plan or settlement on their behalf. Yes, you can do that. I’ve done it many times for my husband.
Avoid Debt for Now
Make an agreement to avoid any further debt until your spouse’s credit is better. Of course, there may be times you have to use credit, such as if your car finally decides it’s time to quit. As far as possible, though, avoid debt for the moment and be strategic about any debt you use in the future.
Celebrate
Set up milestones to celebrate together – even small ones. For instance, you could decide to hit the ice cream parlor or binge-watch your favorite show together every 10 or 20 points their credit rises.
And be sure to set a big reward. Maybe you could go on a vacation once their score is up to 650 or 700. Celebrating both big and small wins helps keep everyone motivated and gives you both something to look forward to.
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Conclusion
Having a spouse with bad credit may seem like the worst thing ever, but it isn’t. Your score is protected, so you don’t have to worry about theirs rubbing off on you. And with some time, planning, and dedication, your spouse’s credit can get cleaned up, as well.